I get by with a little help from some friends

Well, last night, my sweet DH's former college roommate and his wife came to visit. In the end, they ended up staying the night and we talked until nearly 3am. It wouldnt have been so hard except for the obligatory get up and feed thing before we set out to go to both church services. It was well worth it though because I got to talk to Amanda and hope that maybe we can develop into real friends. I loved hearing the stories about the long ago college days of my Hubby and reliving a part of his life that was pre-Melissa. The awkwardness was gone due to the fact that we had met up in Manchester when they were headed near our house on their way to vacation. Ah vacation--a concept that seems quite foreign to me these days. So I had the opportunity to talk to her about the fact that they did not have children, she says it "gets better" and has a little dog that is like a child to her. I appreciate her honesty and the fact that she has come to a point that she doesn't think about not having children. I wonder if this will be my reality in seven more years. For now, I just plain cant see that happening. But it was nice to see a couple that didn't beat the odds still love one another.
Completely off the subject, I have always thought that if I was a "good girl" that I would not struggle with so many issues in marriage, relationships, and life in general. Amanda was a good girl, she was such a good girl that if I did not know her I would think she was a goody goody and be uncomfortable but guess what sometimes our past really doesnt matter? And then while I was learning this life lesson, it was reinforced with the sermon about mercy and God granting mercy and how we need to stop limiting what we can do because of our past. Do you know what Jim Baker is doing? Jim Baker has remarried, they have adopted a child from every continent and are in the process of building Mercy Center for troubled youth that other places refuse to take. Wow, funny how we define people by their mistakes and yet they still can do so much good?
So today, I guess I get through the turmoil by making new friends, forgiving myself and others, and trying to keep reaching out instead of wanting to be by myself.....